[What's wrong, sinner? Wish to communicate with Gundam via telepathic amulet or messenger bird or even in person? Then come on over here and specify the format!]
[She understands his confusion, anger, distrust and everything else that he might feel, but she has much more to relate.
Instead of speaking, she reaches out and takes his hands in her own, face devoid of any sort of mirth. She looks stern, but there is a kindness still lingering, especially for him.
Always for him.]
I need you to listen to me, Tanaka-san. I know that it sounds ridiculous. We all thought so at the time of the revelation, Hinata-san, Owari-san, Souda-san and Kuzuryuu-san. [She lets those names sink in before she speaks again, gathering courage for what she needs to impart.] After your execution, Komaeda-san went... crazy.
He set up his own murder so that the rest of us would die and Nanami-san would survive. Because she and Monomi-san were the spies sent by the Future Foundation to watch over us. However... they sacrificed themselves so that the rest of us might live and make it out.
I have a memory that I would like to share with you, one that I received from the Tree of Memories last week, a few days after you arrived.
[She pulls out a book from her basket, opening the front cover to show a delicate looking petal. The other still hides in the other end of the book.]
This will prove to you what I'm saying and after viewing it, I will attempt to answer any questions you might have.
[Gundam still gives her his attention as he speaks. Because he's believed her... he's always believed her and believed in her, and he knows he has to hear her out. Even if this sounds unbelievable even to the self-proclaimed demon lord. That's why he even lets that hand contact ensue. Her touch may be oddly warm, but what comfort it provides is negligible next to what follows.
He hears her describe some more confusing events. Well, Komaeda's actions actually don't sound unexpected for him. But the idea of Nanami being from the Future Foundation - and sacrificing herself? It can't be.
All of that is nothing compared to the last thing that he is shown. Gundam is utterly wordless during her revelation, and then he quietly takes the petal in both hands as he gazes into it. Komaeda had warned him, hadn't he? About the memories that could appear... ones that he would not want to see.
...
This is definitely something he did not want to see.
Even when Gundam faced his death, he was able to put on a brave face and posture through it all. But this sight of Sonia, so twisted and cruel, along with that glimpse of he himself... It only leaves him feeling cold, and empty. It shows on his face, and it seeps out into the environment. The air around them chills, and the grass starts to whither.
Gundam finally manages to look away from the petal and looks up towards Sonia. He meets her eyes instead, stricken by how different they look. He stares, agape with confusion and shaken as he considers the truth behind her words.]
Th-this... this is not you! This is inconceivable! [He manages to bark out those words, but his objections sound weaker and more desperate than ever. How could reality be so much more twisted than his own imagination?]
That is me in full royal regalia and that is my family's castle in Novoselic. That is the ante-room that leads to the balcony used for official declarations. I might not remember that particular memory as it happened, but I know that room as well as I know my own name. I grew up in there after all.
[She carefully takes the petal back and puts it in the book once more.]
The Future Foundation was sent to destroy all of the Remnants of Despair, but Naegi Makoto and the other survivors of the 78th class took us to Jabberwock Island, removed our memories of our time at Hope's Peak Academy and beyond, and then placed us under what they called the "Neo World Program" to try and redeem us. They wanted to save us from who we'd become under Enoshima's leadership.
[She feels so small, so tired, but this is something that has to be done. Nagito was right that she was the only one who could handle this enough to help Tanaka process everything.]
I have another memory that I'd like you to see, but it can wait if you have any questions.
[The cold air is terrible, but she will endure more than this to help him make it through these revelations. She puts on the jacket she brought with her, glad for a little foresight in this instance.]
Yes. I'm sorry but there is more. And I can understand that you don't know what to ask. A lot of the things that Hinata-san and I know were learned after your departure. Nagito-san learned of our time in Ultimate Despair as a gift from Monokuma-san for his defeat of the Dead Door Room at a much higher difficulty than your success.
It is why he wanted the rest of us to die, because we'd become the one thing that he hated, even himself. However, the thing that I've always found the most terrifying and have had to come to terms with is that my life has now become something I'd never even imagined. I am a criminal, a murderer even if I haven't actually done the killing myself.
With every conversation I have with Enoshima, [the lack of an honorific in this instance is very blatant] I ask myself how I could possibly be friends with someone like that. She is no one's friend. She forced her classmates to do horrific things, killed her own twin sister. All this was done for the sake of something that is unfathomable.
But the other memory I wish to show you is...nice, good. It is confusing, but it isn't damning like that one.
[His head remains bowed sullenly as he welcomes even more events into his head. But for once, a thread of sense does start to connect. That explanation does make sense of how differently that fool had seemed to be acting in the last trial...
...But what does it help now?]
It is not the same... You are not the same- as that. [He feels the need to speak that much at least, to defend this Dark Lady's honor.
But then, he hesitantly glances at her.]
What could possibly seem good after all of that? [He tries not to sound too bitter.]
That was the point of our memory loss. If we couldn't remember what made us fall into despair, we would be available for redemption. The fact of the matter is that Monokuma-san's appearance in the program was as a computer virus whose mission was to continue spreading despair to the world.
So, the me that you've known is who I was before I came to Japan. The memory is of a person that I became. It is still me, no matter what.
As for the other memory, [she opens the book to the end, showing another petal for him to take] I believe you will like it.
[OOC: mobile tag but referencing thread with Nanami on Sonia's last post.]
To... to wipe the darkness from our souls... [He utters what seems to be the case in his own words as he looks down with his fists balled. He feels a heavy weight upon himself at the immenseness of the situation weighs down on him. That they would become such horrific and inhuman monsters, far beyond the type of monster Gundam pretended to be... and that their memories were taken from them in a virtual realm, to try to purify them.
He trembles slightly as the truth of it all settles within him, but he won't cry. Instead, he will look towards that petal with a skeptical eye.]
[And now he looks into the petal and watches the memory unfold, familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. That's not a bad look for my hair...
He doesn't quite understand the context, but it is enough to draw a smile out of him. And some warmth starts spreading in the center of the icy chill, just far enough to reach Sonia.]
I see...
...That one is far easier to take in. It seems that a standard rite of darkness was in effect... [He sounds a little weaker than usual as he speaks, as if he's just run his throat hoarse, but he's trying. He's trying to accept all of these aspects of himself at the same time.]
[The feel of the heat does reach her, but she's still not sure it's wise to take off her jacket.]
I'm not sure what the party is for, but that woman appears to have been our teacher. [And Nanami was a real person, but he doesn't know the truth about their friend just yet.] And she said that we'd grown close in the six months she'd been gone.
[She doesn't want to hope too much. Shyly, she reaches out to touch the palm of his nearest hand.]
I hope that you know that I only want to help you if I can, Tanaka-san. I have said it multiple times, but I feel that it bears repeating after what I've shared with you.
[The party, that purpose and whoever that woman was... Gundam finds it all irrelevant in the face of everything else he's taking in. Rather, he'll settle for satisfaction at the simple fact that Sonia will act as a great ally to him in that other life.
He flinches at her touch, but after a brief moment, he relents to allow it. It's not a bad touch at least. Not at all.]
...I will... acknowledge and accept your alliance, Sonia Nevermind... [His expression is sunken, as if he's aged many years. But he meets her eyes for this much, at least.]
[She is only too pleased to take the little allowances where she can. He isn't the type to be very touchy-feely, but she is. Especially since her arrival to this world.
But she doesn't push it any farther. He's been through enough as it is. The look on his face is a good indication of that.]
Would you like to eat now? I brought lunch for the both of us and something for the Dark Devas as well.
[A light glow returns to his cheeks as the contact continues, although it looks out of place compared to how these revelations are weighing on his features.
He takes a moment to glance towards the Dark Devas, who have huddled into his scarf in fright and to escape from his cold, and then he speaks quietly.]
...It seems that all of this talk has made the Dark Devas famished once more. At this time, they will appreciate any offering. And, I suppose it is only customary that I share the meal as well.
[Reluctantly, Sonia lets go of Gundam's hand and begins to take the food she prepared out of the basket. The hamsters will find seeds and some vegetables for them to one side while she takes out sandwiches, a thermos of lemonade, and some rather curious-looking crisps and sugar cookies.]
I hope that you enjoy this all. [She is both nervous and happy to see what he thinks of her hard work. Who knew how well she'd take to all the cooking lessons everyone's been offering her as of late.]
[The dark devas may have eaten fairly recently, but they have room for snacks, and they're easily pleased by the selection. Some of them stay close to Gundam to try to ease his pained feelings. But Jum-P at least stays on Sonia's shoulder and nestles close to her. Halfway through nibbling on a piece of vegetable, Jum-P gently drifts off into a snooze while resting against her neck.
Gundam shifts lightly and overlooks like the food silently. With all of the weight on his mind, it's hard to find an appetite. But he wants to. As much as he's compared himself to a demon lord, right now he feels like he wants to escape, into being just a normal teenager without this other life full of murder clawing at him.
Soon, he reaches for a sandwich and gently bites into it. There is a pause, and then he manages to smile.]
This food's preparation... it easily surpasses humanity!
[There's a cold chill, and undercurrent that may never disappear from his heart completely now. But at least here, with Sonia and his devas, on this picnic blanket... for this short pocket of time... He's managed to sustain a field of warmth amongst the horror.]
I'm not sure that that's the case, but I'm glad that you're enjoying it nonetheless. All of you.
[As such, she's just happy that she managed to salvage a terrible discussion with something pleasant, even if it's still a little chilly. Eventually, with enough time, the chill will be a distant memory. She hopes.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-21 04:28 am (UTC)Instead of speaking, she reaches out and takes his hands in her own, face devoid of any sort of mirth. She looks stern, but there is a kindness still lingering, especially for him.
Always for him.]
I need you to listen to me, Tanaka-san. I know that it sounds ridiculous. We all thought so at the time of the revelation, Hinata-san, Owari-san, Souda-san and Kuzuryuu-san. [She lets those names sink in before she speaks again, gathering courage for what she needs to impart.] After your execution, Komaeda-san went... crazy.
He set up his own murder so that the rest of us would die and Nanami-san would survive. Because she and Monomi-san were the spies sent by the Future Foundation to watch over us. However... they sacrificed themselves so that the rest of us might live and make it out.
I have a memory that I would like to share with you, one that I received from the Tree of Memories last week, a few days after you arrived.
[She pulls out a book from her basket, opening the front cover to show a delicate looking petal. The other still hides in the other end of the book.]
This will prove to you what I'm saying and after viewing it, I will attempt to answer any questions you might have.
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-21 05:30 am (UTC)He hears her describe some more confusing events. Well, Komaeda's actions actually don't sound unexpected for him. But the idea of Nanami being from the Future Foundation - and sacrificing herself? It can't be.
All of that is nothing compared to the last thing that he is shown. Gundam is utterly wordless during her revelation, and then he quietly takes the petal in both hands as he gazes into it. Komaeda had warned him, hadn't he? About the memories that could appear... ones that he would not want to see.
...
This is definitely something he did not want to see.
Even when Gundam faced his death, he was able to put on a brave face and posture through it all. But this sight of Sonia, so twisted and cruel, along with that glimpse of he himself... It only leaves him feeling cold, and empty. It shows on his face, and it seeps out into the environment. The air around them chills, and the grass starts to whither.
Gundam finally manages to look away from the petal and looks up towards Sonia. He meets her eyes instead, stricken by how different they look. He stares, agape with confusion and shaken as he considers the truth behind her words.]
Th-this... this is not you! This is inconceivable! [He manages to bark out those words, but his objections sound weaker and more desperate than ever. How could reality be so much more twisted than his own imagination?]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-21 06:03 am (UTC)That is me in full royal regalia and that is my family's castle in Novoselic. That is the ante-room that leads to the balcony used for official declarations. I might not remember that particular memory as it happened, but I know that room as well as I know my own name. I grew up in there after all.
[She carefully takes the petal back and puts it in the book once more.]
The Future Foundation was sent to destroy all of the Remnants of Despair, but Naegi Makoto and the other survivors of the 78th class took us to Jabberwock Island, removed our memories of our time at Hope's Peak Academy and beyond, and then placed us under what they called the "Neo World Program" to try and redeem us. They wanted to save us from who we'd become under Enoshima's leadership.
[She feels so small, so tired, but this is something that has to be done. Nagito was right that she was the only one who could handle this enough to help Tanaka process everything.]
I have another memory that I'd like you to see, but it can wait if you have any questions.
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-21 02:05 pm (UTC)The Future Foundation was allegedly their enemy. But they were trying... to save them?
The air keeps growing colder as Gundam frowns.]
There... there is even more?
...I do not know what to ask. ...All of... all of these events, even in the underworld such calamity is unheard of!
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-21 06:12 pm (UTC)Yes. I'm sorry but there is more. And I can understand that you don't know what to ask. A lot of the things that Hinata-san and I know were learned after your departure. Nagito-san learned of our time in Ultimate Despair as a gift from Monokuma-san for his defeat of the Dead Door Room at a much higher difficulty than your success.
It is why he wanted the rest of us to die, because we'd become the one thing that he hated, even himself. However, the thing that I've always found the most terrifying and have had to come to terms with is that my life has now become something I'd never even imagined. I am a criminal, a murderer even if I haven't actually done the killing myself.
With every conversation I have with Enoshima, [the lack of an honorific in this instance is very blatant] I ask myself how I could possibly be friends with someone like that. She is no one's friend. She forced her classmates to do horrific things, killed her own twin sister. All this was done for the sake of something that is unfathomable.
But the other memory I wish to show you is...nice, good. It is confusing, but it isn't damning like that one.
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-22 03:03 am (UTC)...But what does it help now?]
It is not the same... You are not the same- as that. [He feels the need to speak that much at least, to defend this Dark Lady's honor.
But then, he hesitantly glances at her.]
What could possibly seem good after all of that? [He tries not to sound too bitter.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-22 10:59 pm (UTC)So, the me that you've known is who I was before I came to Japan. The memory is of a person that I became. It is still me, no matter what.
As for the other memory, [she opens the book to the end, showing another petal for him to take] I believe you will like it.
[OOC: mobile tag but referencing thread with Nanami on Sonia's last post.]
15th of Penta/Action 1/2
Date: 2016-08-24 12:29 am (UTC)He trembles slightly as the truth of it all settles within him, but he won't cry. Instead, he will look towards that petal with a skeptical eye.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-24 12:39 am (UTC)He doesn't quite understand the context, but it is enough to draw a smile out of him. And some warmth starts spreading in the center of the icy chill, just far enough to reach Sonia.]
I see...
...That one is far easier to take in. It seems that a standard rite of darkness was in effect... [He sounds a little weaker than usual as he speaks, as if he's just run his throat hoarse, but he's trying. He's trying to accept all of these aspects of himself at the same time.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-27 08:20 am (UTC)I'm not sure what the party is for, but that woman appears to have been our teacher. [And Nanami was a real person, but he doesn't know the truth about their friend just yet.] And she said that we'd grown close in the six months she'd been gone.
[She doesn't want to hope too much. Shyly, she reaches out to touch the palm of his nearest hand.]
I hope that you know that I only want to help you if I can, Tanaka-san. I have said it multiple times, but I feel that it bears repeating after what I've shared with you.
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-28 05:40 am (UTC)He flinches at her touch, but after a brief moment, he relents to allow it. It's not a bad touch at least. Not at all.]
...I will... acknowledge and accept your alliance, Sonia Nevermind... [His expression is sunken, as if he's aged many years. But he meets her eyes for this much, at least.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-28 07:22 am (UTC)But she doesn't push it any farther. He's been through enough as it is. The look on his face is a good indication of that.]
Would you like to eat now? I brought lunch for the both of us and something for the Dark Devas as well.
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-28 02:17 pm (UTC)He takes a moment to glance towards the Dark Devas, who have huddled into his scarf in fright and to escape from his cold, and then he speaks quietly.]
...It seems that all of this talk has made the Dark Devas famished once more. At this time, they will appreciate any offering. And, I suppose it is only customary that I share the meal as well.
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-30 05:44 pm (UTC)I hope that you enjoy this all. [She is both nervous and happy to see what he thinks of her hard work. Who knew how well she'd take to all the cooking lessons everyone's been offering her as of late.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-31 01:15 am (UTC)Gundam shifts lightly and overlooks like the food silently. With all of the weight on his mind, it's hard to find an appetite. But he wants to. As much as he's compared himself to a demon lord, right now he feels like he wants to escape, into being just a normal teenager without this other life full of murder clawing at him.
Soon, he reaches for a sandwich and gently bites into it. There is a pause, and then he manages to smile.]
This food's preparation... it easily surpasses humanity!
[There's a cold chill, and undercurrent that may never disappear from his heart completely now. But at least here, with Sonia and his devas, on this picnic blanket... for this short pocket of time... He's managed to sustain a field of warmth amongst the horror.]
15th of Penta/Action
Date: 2016-08-31 06:26 pm (UTC)[As such, she's just happy that she managed to salvage a terrible discussion with something pleasant, even if it's still a little chilly. Eventually, with enough time, the chill will be a distant memory. She hopes.]