Hrngh... Am I to entertain this mongrel's demands then?! [He really doesn't want to play along with those foolish charade. But at the same time, he may as well get this over well.]
...Fine. If that is what the people want, then so be it! I, Gundam Tanaka, hereby vow that if this ceremony is carried through to fruition, I shall destroy this world! And then, I shall remake it, without the existence of those responsible for this ceremony! It is my sincerest promise that you shall all spend your days in the limbo between worlds! While I shall grow into a being of infinite power, w-without any need of companionship!
There you have it, preacher. My sincerest of vows!
[ Huh, not bad! For once she doesn't mind Gundam's dark lord zest, as this is more or less her same sentiment, though mostly she'll just be annoyed if they go through with this ceremony, rather than threatening to erase people's existences...
Still she nods, showing her approval, and acceptance of his vows. With an eye roll, the priest turns to her. It's her turn! ]
If I have to marry this guy, I....I vow I'll knock your block off!!
[ ...That's it. That's the vow. A lot less colorful than his, but it gets the point across! ]
[ It's a good thing Ruby's weapon can speak for itself. Even so, the priest rolls his eyes and moves on in the ceremony, calling up a ringbearer with two rings on a pillow.
Ruby goes pale all over again. ]
Oh, no way! Didn't you hear the part about knocking your block off?!
[Well, Gundam at least is trying to present himself as not being a hero!
His eyes widen as the ringbearer approaches.]
What?! Do you persist in defying our combined wills? [He makes a sweeping gesture towards the ringbearer.] The rings of chaos - send them back from whence they came! There is no need for them on this day!
[ The ringbearer - a tiny turtle-like man with thick glasses and graying hair - only smiles at them and forces one ring each into Ruby and Gundam's hands. Ah, young love these days, always so passionate and strange...
The priest begins to speak once more, indicating that the couple is now supposed to exchange rings. Ruby glances up at Gundam with wide, panicked eyes. She hisses: ]
[Gundam growls as the ring is forced into his hand. One of the last things he'd want to do would be placing that ring physically onto her finger! The rest of the last things he'd want to do would be everything that comes after.]
I agree. Let us abandon this foolish carnival. Run for the hills! [Gundam will waste no time in turning and trying to run!]
[ Ruby wastes no time either, turning to run when he does they actually make it a decent ways down the aisle before a pair of bouncers attempt to grab them.
What the heck? This wedding has bouncers??? Shouldn't that tell them something about trying to force people into marriage??? ]
[Freedom seemed so close! But now those bouncers are gripping his arms.]
Un-unhand me!! [He shouts out angrily! His reactions of distrust just aren't kicking in to help him.] You fiends... Don't you know your actions my bring about the end of the world!
[They don't care. Instead, the bouncers then use dunamis to make the two of them literally bounce back towards the preacher.]
Huargh!!
[It turns out that while they were dealing with the bouncers, the preacher had asked if anyone had objected to this marriage, and says he would have stopped the wedding if anyone had said so. But now the time has passed, so on with the show!]
[ Yikes! Talk about a literal bouncer! Ruby is utterly helpless as they bounce right back towards the preacher, pale as a ghost now as the priest asks her if she will take this man as her husband!!! ]
Wh-what?! No! Of course not! I do not want to get married!
[ However, the words "I do" were in there, so that seems good enough for the priest, and he goes on asking Gundam the same question. ]
[Gundam looks practically broken. The idea of being married to this fool... and now on top of that, being asked to do something even more unspeakable?!]
Th-that is not allowed! [He sputters nervously.] I cannot administer the kiss of death on just any knave! N-now release me from this chain and lead this charade end at once!
[But their protests fall on deaf ears!! Instead, a swarm of children start nudging at their legs to push them closer together!]
[ Kiss of death?! He doesn't mean that literally, does he? Given what she knows about Gundam it's just another one of his weird edgelord sayings, but then again...if she has to kiss him, she very well may actually die.
But those children continue to push them towards each other, their cherubic, laughing faces concealing the little monsters they are beneath. They nudge Ruby right up against Gundam, her face absolutely erupting into flames. The heat around them is intense from their embarrassment. Ruby can hardly even breathe anymore, and everyone around them is calling for their kiss — ]
Oh, whatever!
[ There's clearly one way out of this, and she'd rather take initiative and just get it over with before the priest literally pushes their heads together. So taking a deep breath, she steels herself and tips her chin up, giving Gundam the quickest, briefest peck on the lips.
[Gundam himself is blushing and sweating madly as their faces grow closer together while the heat of embarrassment further bakes them. This isn't proper for a dark lord at all!!
He is ready to curse everyone around them. But then, it happens so fast.]
Ngh-!
[As his lips are pecked, he turns redder than ever! It looks more like he's the one hit by a spell of paralysis, as he stands there almost still as a statue in the aftermath of that quick kiss.
And that seems to be enough for the priest! The handcuffs open and fall lifelessly to the ground, while everyone congratulates them and showers them with confetti!]
[ If Ruby weren't blushing so much herself, she might find it funny how red and stiff Gundam is looking. But as it is, she can't quite muster the enthusiasm to tease him right now. Because teasing him would be like teasing herself!
That confetti rains over them, though it quickly burns up into ashes before it can even fall onto Ruby's shoulders. She gingerly grabs onto Gundam's wrist, dragging him away from the altar.
Just because they aren't handcuffed anymore doesn't mean they're done!! As soon as they're a few yards away, Ruby whirls on him again pointing a finger right at his nose. ]
[Ah yes, he ends up making a lot of the confetti burn up as well. But for the most part, he's barely responsive, and he only remembers how to move when Ruby drags him from the altar.
As they come to a stop, he manages to regain enough control over himself to yank his wrist back out of her grasp and to tug up his scarf to cover as much of his still-red face as possible. Gundam then looks away as he replies sternly.]
What never happened? N-nothing at all has happened in recent history. There was not a single event of note! Anyone who attempts to claim otherwise shall become the victim of a terrible curse! [That's a 'yes' from him, as he tries to remove the cursed wedding ring.]
[ Thank goodness he's going along with this. If he was going to make a big to-do about it she would have probably died. She's still going to die as it is. What a complete nightmare.
She tugs off her ring too, but once she has it in her hand she...isn't sure what to do with it. She doesn't want to just...throw it away. That doesn't feel right. So instead, she just sticks into into her pocket and turns on her heel to go. ]
[If she made a big to-do about it, then he would have died! He's not ready to be slain by something like this.
He has trouble getting his off. It's kinda stuck! Still, he appreciates her parting sentiment and growls in turn.]
Indeed... goodbye forever!
[He then... continues to stand there as he struggles with his ring and manages to focus his dunamis enough to surround himself with a dark shadow, to provide the illusion of him also retreating!
This cursed ring! Maybe he'll let the Dark Devas hold onto it, to prevent evidence of its existence from leaking out into the material world!]
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2018-04-26 12:29 pm (UTC)...Fine. If that is what the people want, then so be it! I, Gundam Tanaka, hereby vow that if this ceremony is carried through to fruition, I shall destroy this world! And then, I shall remake it, without the existence of those responsible for this ceremony! It is my sincerest promise that you shall all spend your days in the limbo between worlds! While I shall grow into a being of infinite power, w-without any need of companionship!
There you have it, preacher. My sincerest of vows!
no subject
Date: 2018-04-27 05:54 am (UTC)Still she nods, showing her approval, and acceptance of his vows. With an eye roll, the priest turns to her. It's her turn! ]
If I have to marry this guy, I....I vow I'll knock your block off!!
[ ...That's it. That's the vow. A lot less colorful than his, but it gets the point across! ]
no subject
Date: 2018-04-27 02:57 pm (UTC)Th-that's it?! That is no vow! It is not nearly as long or complicated as my masterpiece was!
no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 06:10 am (UTC)Hmpf! It's all I needed to say! I'll let Crescent Rose do the rest of the talking for me.
[ Because she might not have worked on the handcuffs, but Crescent Rose could definitely cut that priest down to size! ]
no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 12:20 pm (UTC)Is that all? [He rolls his eyes.] Fine. I suppose that an oath of destruction is better than none at all!
[Then, he glares toward the priest.]
You would do well to remember those vows before you try to continue this ritual, old man!
no subject
Date: 2018-04-30 05:22 am (UTC)Yeah! Darn tootin'!
[ It's a good thing Ruby's weapon can speak for itself. Even so, the priest rolls his eyes and moves on in the ceremony, calling up a ringbearer with two rings on a pillow.
Ruby goes pale all over again. ]
Oh, no way! Didn't you hear the part about knocking your block off?!
no subject
Date: 2018-04-30 08:02 pm (UTC)His eyes widen as the ringbearer approaches.]
What?! Do you persist in defying our combined wills? [He makes a sweeping gesture towards the ringbearer.] The rings of chaos - send them back from whence they came! There is no need for them on this day!
no subject
Date: 2018-05-02 05:27 am (UTC)The priest begins to speak once more, indicating that the couple is now supposed to exchange rings. Ruby glances up at Gundam with wide, panicked eyes. She hisses: ]
Gundam! We have to get out of here!
no subject
Date: 2018-05-02 07:12 am (UTC)I agree. Let us abandon this foolish carnival. Run for the hills! [Gundam will waste no time in turning and trying to run!]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-05 06:44 am (UTC)What the heck? This wedding has bouncers??? Shouldn't that tell them something about trying to force people into marriage??? ]
Get your hands off me!
no subject
Date: 2018-05-05 09:27 pm (UTC)Un-unhand me!! [He shouts out angrily! His reactions of distrust just aren't kicking in to help him.] You fiends... Don't you know your actions my bring about the end of the world!
[They don't care. Instead, the bouncers then use dunamis to make the two of them literally bounce back towards the preacher.]
Huargh!!
[It turns out that while they were dealing with the bouncers, the preacher had asked if anyone had objected to this marriage, and says he would have stopped the wedding if anyone had said so. But now the time has passed, so on with the show!]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-06 04:56 pm (UTC)Wh-what?! No! Of course not! I do not want to get married!
[ However, the words "I do" were in there, so that seems good enough for the priest, and he goes on asking Gundam the same question. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-06 06:15 pm (UTC)Does this human girl look like a dark bride of the neatherealm to you?! I do not agree to this-
[He's cut off by the firing of confetti, as the priest moves on.
"With that, I now declare you husband and wife!"
Gundam watches with a tranquil fury.]
No, it cannot be... It is impossible!!
no subject
Date: 2018-05-09 04:16 am (UTC)"You may now kiss the bride!" ]
WHAT?!
[ SHE CAN'T, THIS IS NOT HOW RUBY ROSE DIES
But neither is anyone making a move to release them from the handcuffs. They are not yet satisfied! ]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-09 01:12 pm (UTC)Th-that is not allowed! [He sputters nervously.] I cannot administer the kiss of death on just any knave! N-now release me from this chain and lead this charade end at once!
[But their protests fall on deaf ears!! Instead, a swarm of children start nudging at their legs to push them closer together!]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-12 06:33 pm (UTC)But those children continue to push them towards each other, their cherubic, laughing faces concealing the little monsters they are beneath. They nudge Ruby right up against Gundam, her face absolutely erupting into flames. The heat around them is intense from their embarrassment. Ruby can hardly even breathe anymore, and everyone around them is calling for their kiss — ]
Oh, whatever!
[ There's clearly one way out of this, and she'd rather take initiative and just get it over with before the priest literally pushes their heads together. So taking a deep breath, she steels herself and tips her chin up, giving Gundam the quickest, briefest peck on the lips.
!!!! ]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-13 05:22 am (UTC)He is ready to curse everyone around them. But then, it happens so fast.]
Ngh-!
[As his lips are pecked, he turns redder than ever! It looks more like he's the one hit by a spell of paralysis, as he stands there almost still as a statue in the aftermath of that quick kiss.
And that seems to be enough for the priest! The handcuffs open and fall lifelessly to the ground, while everyone congratulates them and showers them with confetti!]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-17 05:44 am (UTC)That confetti rains over them, though it quickly burns up into ashes before it can even fall onto Ruby's shoulders. She gingerly grabs onto Gundam's wrist, dragging him away from the altar.
Just because they aren't handcuffed anymore doesn't mean they're done!! As soon as they're a few yards away, Ruby whirls on him again pointing a finger right at his nose. ]
That NEVER happened! Are we clear?!
no subject
Date: 2018-05-17 08:42 pm (UTC)As they come to a stop, he manages to regain enough control over himself to yank his wrist back out of her grasp and to tug up his scarf to cover as much of his still-red face as possible. Gundam then looks away as he replies sternly.]
What never happened? N-nothing at all has happened in recent history. There was not a single event of note! Anyone who attempts to claim otherwise shall become the victim of a terrible curse! [That's a 'yes' from him, as he tries to remove the cursed wedding ring.]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-18 09:42 pm (UTC)[ Thank goodness he's going along with this. If he was going to make a big to-do about it she would have probably died. She's still going to die as it is. What a complete nightmare.
She tugs off her ring too, but once she has it in her hand she...isn't sure what to do with it. She doesn't want to just...throw it away. That doesn't feel right. So instead, she just sticks into into her pocket and turns on her heel to go. ]
Um - goodbye! Forever.
[ Hopefully. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-05-18 11:13 pm (UTC)He has trouble getting his off. It's kinda stuck! Still, he appreciates her parting sentiment and growls in turn.]
Indeed... goodbye forever!
[He then... continues to stand there as he struggles with his ring and manages to focus his dunamis enough to surround himself with a dark shadow, to provide the illusion of him also retreating!
This cursed ring! Maybe he'll let the Dark Devas hold onto it, to prevent evidence of its existence from leaking out into the material world!]